Posts

Thank you Google

Google, you rock!  The Navigation add-on on the Android is rather spiffing, especially now you've fixed it so that it works in NZ.   However, there is one wee bitty problem in the function where you can speak your destination, though it is proving somewhat amusing.  We've tried Kiwi, English, South African, Welsh and German accents, which all result in some interesting locations; only when we adopt a US accent do we get close to the right location.  Now as much as I enjoy playing around with accents, it can be pretty embarrassing in the car if other people are with you and you suddenly start talking like an American just to get your phone to understand you.  It just isn't cricket old chaps.  So any chance you could do a wee tweak to Navigation so that people can 'Speak Your Destination' in their own native accent?  That would be rather spiffing thanks.

Further adventures on the dark side - DB2

DB2 is currently driving me insane. All the normal things you can do in SQLServer seem to be missing, PIVOT for example, which in SQLServer allows you to.... wait for it.... cross tab your queries, weird that eh?  Though if they'd been really creative about it then it could have caused your data to do a rendition of swan lake before settling down into a cross-tab; that I would pay to see.   Anyhoo, back to DB2 and the lack of PIVOT.  In order to achieve the same cross-tab result I have to jump into Excel, link my worksheet to a DB2 query, refresh the data in Excel, and then use Excel to perform the PIVOT.  How drawn out and painful is that?  Okay, whining over, back to the DB2 adventures.

Adventures on the dark side

Last week I trundled along to a full day event covering various aspects of Oracle DB schemas, indexing and database optimisation. Why did I do this? From a personal point of view I like to understand SQL from all the different viewpoints. I spent 2 years as a Sybase developer, I am currently studying for Microsoft SQL Server 2008 exams and have recently been focusing on performance tuning and maintaining indexes in MS SQL. I was curious what sort of differences, if any, there would be between the Oracle and MS optimisation practices. Quite a lot it seems. I was expecting to find more similarities than differences, so was mildly surprised by what I heard. For the intial stages, Oracle and MS devs are in agreement. 1. Before you start coding, implement a strategy for handling errors that all the developers/DBAs will adhere to. Try..Catches that developers add willy nilly are not a strategy. You need to ensure that errors are captured, reported, handled correctly, and tha

Cycle Powered Internet Surfing

We were having one of the usual random discussions at work today, you know the kind, conversations that start off relatively normally, degrade into utter cobblers and then go off at weird tangents and you end up discussing cycle powered internet. Overview In order to surf the Internet, staff members need to use the pedal attachment on their PC to generate surfing minutes. Plus points Less work for IT Support as they no longer need to monitor every little thing and add anything remotely interesting to the insanely restrictive proxy. You think I’m joking? I tried to open google.co.nz the other day and got a message about it being banned because it was Arms and Weaponry. What the ???? There are no restrictions other than for rudey and/or illegal stuffs, so staff can check Hotmail if they want to… woo hoo… Increases fitness Allows bosses to easily see who is surfing the internet instead of working through the following easy to spot methods:  Massive increase in calf muscle

Strange goings on in SQL land

Weird things with dates I have a simple sql script that extracts raw data from a quality centre database and extracts it to an excel spreadsheet, part of this is shown below: SELECT bg_bug_id as DefectID, bg_detection_date as RawDetectionDate, convert(varchar(10), bg_detection_date, 103) as FormatDetDate, bg_closing_date as RawClosingDate, convert(varchar(10), bg_closing_date, 103) as FormatCloseDate FROM BUG The issue I'm having is with the formatted dates. Some come through correctly and are left justified with the correct date, the others come through in US format and are right justified. When looking at the excel cell format, the left justified correct dates are showing as General format, and the incorrect right justified dates are Date format. Yes, I could just do the formatting on the RawDate in Excel which guarantees the correct date, and yes I could do some fancy malarky casting to a string and then back to a date but that

Logic FAIL: Monty Hall Problem – GAH!

Now those of you who know me well will know that I love maths, I can spend hours and hours playing around with equations and figures and formulae, however a friend (http://rocko.co.nr/) told me at the weekend about the Monty Hall Problem and this one got me right in the logic chip. My first reaction to this was ‘that can’t be right, it doesn’t make mathematical sense’. It is a very counter intuitive problem and one that has caused much debate over the years if my googling on the subject is anything to go by. The problem for those of you who don’t know it: "Suppose you're on a game show and you're given the choice of three doors: Behind one door is a car; behind the others, goats. You pick a door, say No. 1, and the host, who knows what's behind the other doors, opens another door, say No. 3, which has a goat. He then says to you, 'Do you want to pick door No. 2?' Is it to your advantage to take the switch?” Ref: http://math.ucsd.edu/~crypto/Monty/montybg.htm

SQL Server 2008 Certifications update

SQL Saturday in Auckland went really well on Saturday. Huge thank you to everyone who attended and especially to Dave Dustin for pulling it all together. On Saturday I re-presented the 15 minute certifications talk. As the last time this was presented was November 2008, there were quite a few changes. The ppt slides have been updated to reflect the changes since Nov 2008 and the latest version has been uploaded. Let me know if you have any questions on any of the presentations or white papers.